Tripping Through the Enchanted Forest

Ramblings on the winding path.

Wednesday, January 15, 2014

The last couple of weeks have been difficult - solid sleep has been evading me, the challenges of dealing with a half-trained puppy and a cat who hates him have been consuming me, and the question marks still looming over my wife's health are preoccupying me. Just when I think I'm having a good day, something happens and my fragile foothold on solid ground slips and I go flailing back to overwhelm, anger and exhaustion. I'm trying to function at work, but the changes in me over the last month have not gone unnoticed. I have to find a way to pull it together before my team is impacted beyond repair. I have to find the right time to have some conversations I've been putting off. I have to find a way to get better sleep and to remember to eat while at work. I have to find a way to balance what needs to be done with taking care of myself. 


Wednesday, January 01, 2014

New Years - You asked for it

Yes, it's been a long time. A very long time, I see. So much has happened, and is happening, that it has been hard to keep tracking of passing time.

I know some people have been wondering when I would start posting again. You may regret it....

So here it is, New Year's Day 2014. 2013 was a challenge, with lots of ups and downs. I am hoping that 2014 has a lot more ups, but I am honestly having trouble trusting that.

So much good was finally happening, life clicking into place. In 2012 I got a promotion and bought a house out in the country. 2013 started off with a dear friend fighting a losing battle with Multiple Myeloma, which took her away from us on Memorial Day. I miss her terribly. It ended with the loss of a high school classmate a week after Thanksgiving, due to respiratory arrest caused by an unannounced illness. Between July and now, we have been dealing with the wife's as-yet-undiagnosed progressive neurological illness, which is taking a toll on both of us. So forgive me if I don't seem too optimistic about 2014; I'm doing the best I can.

My first rant of the new year is brought on by email and facebook ads and status updates: we are a culture obsessed by dieting and weight loss. You think you need to lose 10 pounds? Think again! 10 pounds does not make you more beautiful or healthier.

Yes, I'm 10 pounds over my ideal weight. So what? My wife is 40 pounds less than she was in July and now weighs less than I do even though she is four inches taller than me. THAT is a health concern. Stop with the frickin weight loss plans already!

Tuesday, February 19, 2008

OMGLOL

Humorous Pictures
moar humorous pics

Monday, December 31, 2007

7

Today is the seventh anniversary of my ordination in the Temple and Fellowship of Isis.

In those seven years, I have....
....presided at seven weddings
....participated in interfaith services and work for equality
....sat two death vigils
....dedicated four babies
....provided pastoral counseling for many
....taught countless workshops on paganism and Reiki
....written many articles
....preached in 20 different pulpits

In seven years, every cell in my body has been replaced. I literally am not the same person I was that day. I am more confident, more stable, more grounded. And I feel a need to reinvent my spiritual practices in this new home, in this new place.

Sunday, October 28, 2007

25

Yesterday I had a very busy calendar with three different events on tap - I skipped all of them but our Samhain ritual last night. One of the ones I skipped was a workshop at work; yeah, I could use the CEUs, but there was no way I could get myself moving.

The other event was my 25th high school reunion.

Gasp! you say. How could she bail on that?

For one thing, I haven't attended a class reunion in 20 years. The nearing of my 10 year reunion sent me into a suicidal spin that landed me in therapy. I felt like I was a failure, working as a secretary for just above minimum wage after graduating second in my class, while others in my class were already pulling 6-figure incomes. I couldn't face it.

My 20th reunion invitation found me in a much healthier place, but carried a pricetag of about $75 per person. Yeah, right! Skipped that one, too.

Our 25th reunion was a little more reasonably priced, and yet I have felt very noncommittal about it. For one thing, I have had no contact with any of my classmates for the last 20+ years until a few weeks ago, when one classmate emailed and called me, and then another did the same. Nice, right? but it's been more than 20 years.... The two close friends that I had kept in touch with after graduation fell by the wayside a long time ago. What would be the point of going? I don't play games, I don't care how many diamonds you're wearing or where your husband works or who you had over for dinner last night. I would talk to the few people I would like to catch up with, and then I'd be done. I would have to play nice and look interested for the next couple of hours when all I wanted to do was leave. I might as well be at work!

Did I mention I attended an all-girl Catholic high school?

Can you imagine the reaction when they asked me what I've been doing for the last 25 years?

"Well, I graduated from Cal State Fullerton with a degree in History. Got married. Had 3 kids. I'm divorced. Oh yeah, and I'm a lesbian."

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Monday, October 08, 2007

18


It has finally happened.

My youngest, Nicole, turned 18 on Friday.

Whew!

She wanted to celebrate her birthday with our friends from TOILA, so wifey and I spent hours and hours cleaning an apartment that hasn't seen that thorough a cleaning in a couple of months. And the food shopping - oy, vey! Then there is the food prep (thanks, Jo!).... it just never ends! By the time 2pm rolled around, I was already exhausted. Then the guests started arriving.

We had a good time visiting with everyone, and Nicole got some wonderful gifts from my sister-priestesses. She is such an adult in so many ways, and yet so young in others.

Happy Birthday, Nicole!

Monday, October 01, 2007

20 Years Ago Today

I was starting my second month of teaching high school history at my alma mater. I had arrived early enough - around 7:15 am - to prepare for classes to begin at 8:00 am. I had stopped into the office and then the upstairs teachers' lounge for a cup of coffee, and was walking down the hallway to my classroom at around 7:40 am.

The school is built into the side of a hill, with the first floor only open on one side; the second floor had two sides to it, and my room was on the back side. Along the hallway across from the classrooms were lockers and a wall of plexiglass, blocking the view of hillside above us.

I heard the plexiglass rattle and thought it must be a sonic boom; we were right under the flight path of the space shuttle on its way to land at Edwards Air Force Base. My second thought was that it could not be the shuttle - this was a year and a half after the Challenger explosion and the fleet was still grounded. My entire thought process from the rattle to my conclusion felt like minutes but was probably a nanosecond. I knew it was an earthquake. I yelled to the girls in the hallway to get away from the windows and to duck down and cover their heads. We hadn't had an earthquake of any size in their lifetimes; the last big one we'd had in LA was the Sylmar quake in 1971, more than 18 years earlier.

When the shaking stopped we had all the students evacuate the building down to the lawn, where we gathered everyone by home room and started taking roll. Part of the problem was that school hadn't started yet, and students were still arriving on campus. At the same time, frantic parents were calling the school office and showing up out front to take their girls back home again. We must have stood outside on that lawn in 100+ degree heat for a good 6 hours trying to sort everything out. Fortunately, there was no damage to the school other than hysterical students and frayed nerves.

It turned out to have been a fairly large quake (5.9 or so - data varies) on a previously unknown fault, and became known as the Whittier Narrows quake. The epicenter was pretty close to downtown Whittier, which was at the other end of the range of hills that the school was built into the side of - about 10 miles away. No wonder we had such a ride. Downtown Whittier had major damage; many of the old buildings were of unreinforced masonry. It took them months to clean it up.

Not long after that, we set up an emergency plan. All of the teachers were involved. We bought containers and supplies (food, water, first aid, etc) to last the entire school population for three days. We all received First Aid training. I was assigned to the Search and Rescue team, and we had drills with students and teachers acting out the roles of the injured and deceased. It was quite an undertaking, and I learned quite a bit. The school went from having a vague idea of what to do during an emergency to having a well-orchestrated plan. I have no idea if they are still as well-prepared, but I certainly hope so.

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